The presence of a baby sister can certainly add to the joy in the family. However, it seems that this does not necessarily apply to his brother. The older brother might feel less cared for, causing jealousy or even hatred towards his sister. Check out tips on how to prepare a brother to welcome a baby brother as his new family.
It is important for you to prepare your older siblings, especially those under the age of 8, to be able to accept the presence of your baby sister with enthusiasm and pleasure. If your brother is under 2 years old, he usually does not understand the meaning of having a brother. It is different if the brother has aged 2 years and over. Children at this age may be able to feel jealous if they see you pay attention to other children besides themselves.
If the Eldest is still under 2 years old, usually he does not understand the meaning of having a brother. Different if the Eldest has aged 2 years and over. Children at this age may be able to feel jealous if they see you pay attention to other children besides themselves.
To anticipate this, here are some tips that you can apply to the Eldest.
Introduce Brother to his younger brother as early as possible
After learning that you are positively second pregnancy, spread this happy news to your first child.
- Tell him soon he will become a big brother. Hold her hand to hold your stomach while saying that inside there is now a baby sister. The goal is to create closeness between brother and sister later.
- Start replacing affectionate calls for the Eldest, for example by starting to call him 'Brother' to foster a sense of maturity.
- Show the development of your stomach to the Eldest. Teach him as early as possible to always love his sister even though it is still in the stomach. You can do this by getting her to talk to your baby's sister in the stomach, holding your stomach when the baby starts kicking, or can have her kiss your stomach too.
- Maybe if the older sister is able to talk, she will ask, "What is the baby sister doing in the mother's stomach?" You don't need to answer it seriously. Answer, "Now the baby's sister is smiling because she was kissed by you," or say something positive.
- When your pregnancy gets bigger and your eldest asks to play with you, while your condition is not possible, you can tell him that you are tired. But as much as possible do not say that it is because of your pregnancy, explain that you are tired because of something else.
- You can also tell the truth by saying, "Child, having a baby requires a lot of struggle. Sometimes that can make you tired, especially when your sister grows. This also happened when I was pregnant with you. "
Get in the habit of the eldest meeting a baby
Being accustomed to being an only child, it might make the older sister not accustomed to being around other children younger than her, or seeing you holding another baby. In this case, there are a number of things you can do to familiarize your baby with the baby and make him or her welcome, such as:
Try to take the sister to the house of your relatives or friends who have babies.
But remember, you do not expect more. Maybe The Eldest will come up with reactions that you don't expect, such as refusing to play with them, crying when you see you holding another baby, fighting for toys, or even being mean to other babies. If it's like that, it's better not to be forced, than he keeps a negative impression about having a baby sister. You can try to introduce it another time slowly. During this process, show that you can still pay attention to him, even if he is holding another baby.
Shows photos of your brother when he was a baby.
You can also do this to teach him that he used to be a baby. You can say, "Do you think your baby's hair will be like you or not?"
Invite the brother when you check the womb.
If your first child shows a positive response about his sister, you can invite him when you check the womb. When monitoring your condition and the fetus with ultrasound, your doctor can explain the condition of the baby's sister in the womb to him. Once at home, you can invite The Eldest to help give a name to his sister if he is interested.
Involve the Eldest when Preparing for Baby's Needs
Asking for help to prepare all the needs of the baby can make the Eldest feel part of the family, while reducing anxiety.
- Involve him when choosing equipment for his sister, such as buying baby clothes according to his choice.
- You can also take him to wash clothes or other baby equipment before use when your second child is born. In general, children like to play with water and foam.
- But if the Eldest is still under 2 years old, usually he still likes these items and will assume that they are his. You don't need to stop him from playing with his brother's equipment. Just let him have fun because usually in a few days, he will forget it by itself.
When Baby Sisters Are Born
When the anticipated moment finally arrives, instead you must pay extra attention to the Eldest. Although still experiencing pain after giving birth, as much as possible display a happy face when the Eldest came.
- Hug the Eldest Brother while saying, "Now you have become a big brother." You can also give him gifts, such as clothes that say ‘I Love My Sister’ or ‘I Love My Brother’. Say that the gift was given by his sister.
- Maybe at a time like this, your attention and the whole family will be focused on the newborn baby. However, try to still pay attention to the Eldest by always involving him in every activity there. For example during a photo session. Always invite The Eldest to take a picture together or hold a photo session of The Big Brother with his new sister.
When The Eldest Begins to Look for Attention
There are times when the Eldest will seek attention by deliberately breaking the rules. Some things you can do include:
- Better to just ignore his actions. The more you scold him or forbid him, then the Eldest will continue to do it, because he considers the way it managed to attract your attention. If you ignore it, the Eldest may find positive ways to attract attention. When he does something positive, don't forget to give him a compliment to feel cared for.
- If you think his behavior is intolerable, like abusing his sister, you can punish him and say that his actions are not good. As much as possible do not leave the Eldest alone with his sister. Always accompany if the two are together.
It's not easy to give the same attention to two children at the same time. It is also undeniable that your current attention may be more focused on baby sister. If you can't understand the situation, you can advise him like, "You shouldn't be jealous or jealous if you see your mother or father paying more attention to your sister. A baby's sister needs more attention because she can't do anything herself. Unlike the older siblings who have now grown up. "
Do not forget to always give praise and instill in his mind that he has become a big brother and has grown up. Always invite the Eldest to help you when caring for her baby sister, so she does not feel ignored.
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